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hello there, ya its been a while:
things are going better sence you last read, and that was a while ago. im mostly a myspace man now (www.myspace.com/matbunnell), but i spew some stuff on here for now.
job
i totally have an interview, thursday at 8 am. is for a teachers aid position. for those of you who dont know what this is ill explain: in rough/disabled classes the teacher cannot handle everything so helpers are hired called aids. there is class room aids, they help every student, and one on one aids, they are assigned a spesific student. the possition coming open this coming school year is for a one on one full time possition for a boy all day and another boy half the day. sooo hopeni get it. not that i dont like super 8, i just dont like workin 2nd shift (3pm-11pm).
linda
shes doin a lot better, shes out of the hosptial. shes been cooking all the meals for her son and mom, bnut hasnt been that good at cleaning. i set some standards: shes can talk to me on the phone every other day and i come down to here house once a week or so and hang out, run to the store for them, or watch the kids (the have several little young-ins). o and ive been reading the bible to her lately. shes always wanted me to but we got in a little bit of a debate on day so i opened up the good book, and weve been doin it ever sence. so thats pretty awsome.
place
alot of my good friends that i go to church with live in this one appartment complex. 5 places, 1 on the bottom, 2 on the 2nd floor, and 2 and a half on the 3rd. the apartment on the bottom floor might be coming open, cuz the people that are living there are considering going to one of the secound floor apartments. this bottom apartment is rumored to only be 250 a month, water and trash. pretty dang good, no kitchen though, but i can deal with that.
india
i have 1250 saved for india, i call that confirmation. so im planin to go ethier this christmas or next summer. depends if i get the aid jog. if i do that it will have to be summer, the only other time of would be christmas and my mom would flip a pancake or two if i went then. if the aid job falls through, ill go work at the state hospitol in town. theyve been wantin to hire me but i cant start training cuz of camp at the end of this month. pluss id like the aiding job ALOT more. but if i work with the hospital i could probable go alot sooner. one, time is easier to get off, two, they pay 12 an hour.
devo book
ive been doing one called "called and acountable". its kind of a butt kicker, it makes you asks your self questions that you cant answer in a minute or two. its good for me right now, instead of living in such a lazy state with god im now semi alert and thinking about stuff.
ok, im done, have a good one...... | | |
| Im 24
lent
well lent was great. i think im gonna be liven with dad for a while, at least till india (whenever that happens). im pretty close to getting another job too, its with a state hospital. they had me do a piss test, back ground check, physical...............the works. ive been hangin out with my girls on the square more and more. im REALLY falling in love with my church.
1 peter
im now involved in a small group through my church. our book of concentration is, you guessed it, first peter. it goes down every other saturday night. we meet for dinner, then talk about our weeks for a while, then spend a good 45 mins in discussion and study of ol papy petes writings. does anyone remeber the tv show pete and pete? anyways. i really really value this time with them. i feel like ive been missing out on this for the past year of life. like asking god "friends? growth? joy?" and him replying " other people and me"
Linda
she is currently staying in a psychiatric hospital. this is after spending nearly a week or so in jail for trespassing and harassment. what really tryed the peace this time was when she went down to the high, a local resteraunt, and rasied a fuss. i was kinda perterbed that her social worker let her stay locked up for so long. me and mb (mary beth, one of the girls on the square that has been a great friend to me and to linda) talked about it and ya know, there she was looked after and had constent supervision.
not that her mom doesnt look after her or love her, but her mom, hazel, is older and cant be runnin around ever where, makin her take all her pills, makin sure she doesnt leave the house, etc..... hazel is an old lady with back problems and lives of very little money (less than me), she needs help with her daughter. so thier tryin to put linda in a group home (they being various social worker poeple) but she (linda) doesnt want that, niehter do we. what we think is lindas gravest need now is to get her meds straghtined out. that can best be done at the hospital shes staying at now. a place that will make her take her meds, and not let her do what ever she wants.
job
so ya a state hospital, takin care of the crazy. i'd be workin there as a TPW, therepudic program worker, takin care of the disabled and retarded. ya know its not as hard as you would think. if your a people person it can come to you pretty naturally. i havent worked with to many mr/dd (mental retardation/de-somthin disabled) people, but i think ill be ok at it. it seems poeple with these problems know that they have a problem, that thier not right. the patients that bring the real concern are the ones that think nothing is wrong with them, interesting huh?
the only problem i for see is getting time off for the camps im working. that is two whole weeks at the end of july. hopefully it will work out, and if it doesnt ill try like hell to see that it does.
housing,
unless i get kicked out im stayin put. the job i have right now, super 8, doesnt pay enough for me to get a place. the loan payments are about 350 a month, put cell phone, gas, and various other things on top and ya hit the celling. if i get this job i might be able to aford it but i want to save up for india, thus the delima. for the longest time my dad was a burden (love him more, talk to him more, spend more time with him) but now i actually like the guy. im so thankful for this and pray that it only intensifies.
dots not feathers,
i prayed for an answer about india, and i guess im still waiting. but i still really wanna go, so im going to.....i think. i have to save for: a plane ticket, payments that i will miss, and a VISA!!!!!.
a new joy
a new realization of how much spending time with god is amazing and needed has bursted onto my scene. i really feel as if im being comunicated to through scripture. i still struggle to set time aside for it, i trust entertainment to satisfy me, i replace love for entertainment. sad but true, the demon im fighting so to speak. video games or time with my lover? adult swim or relizing that his disire is for me?
a new thought
the struggle with romans six, gace and law, has, i think, finally come to an end in my mind. 'you cannot except christs freedom without excepting his slavery as well'. yes he is graceful but he is also demanding. yes he is your lover but he is also you king. yes he is your best frind but he is also your judge. if you take his yoke of grace you must also take his yoke of slavery, yes or no, 100r 0.that is it. he is a lion that wants all of you and also loves all of you, both relentlessly. thats what ive come to.
pray for this:
a guy named casy, my sister (female stuff), my dad (other stuff), the gallions (hazel, linda and fam). | | |
| back, but for good reason
well, mainly i wanted to post about two prayer requests:
one is my pastor friend over in india, he's now in debt 700 american dollars, so pray for him.
two, my friend linda, 47 bi-polar scizophranic, has been on some meds recently that arnt working at all. in the past two weeks shes been arrested twice for criminal tresspassing. i stoped to see her with my frined MB and she threatend to call the police. shes convinced her son (anthony) is evil and thinks the same some what for me and MB. she just isnt the linda gallion i know. this does wake me up to a few things: to how much this needs prayer and how much she needs help. also that i need to love her more as a sister and friend, not as a job. so its good in that respect but man. so pray for clarity on lindas behave. clarity to see things sanely, clarity to see her situation for what it really is (shes living at home with her mom and son, but we really want her to go to a group home, she doesnt want this at all, mostly cuz when shes home she can pretty much do what every she wants...this is not a good thing. her mom does keep on eye on her, but she can only take so much).
ok....here we go, no more xanga or myspace till easter......3.....2.....1....GOOOOO | | |
| lent is upon us
so guess what im giving up for lent.....this. ya its time to not messure my life by how many times i check my blog sites in a day. so fare well for now, send me an email if you want to. so heres my last entry:
the plan to move out seems to be going well, i found 4 for rent signs on the west side of town. the momey part really depends on how fast my plane ticket refund comes in, if it comes in.
im still not feeling totally at peace with the whole thing, mostly this rests on me and my dad. i had hoped that we would be a little closer before i did somthing like this. all i can see in this is my falure, but i must keep in mind that im forgiven. i am no ones saviour. i keep thinking that moving out is a selfish thing. its the "yeah im gettin my own place, woohoo" over the "man i need to spend more time with my father".
uhhhh, some times the mind works to much, guess thats why we cant always trust what we think is right, or what we feel is right for that matter.
so hopefully when i post again ill have my own place and 2 jobs or just another better one.
peace for now, and later -bunns | | |
| why i couldnt go to india
so if one is to go to india from the u.s. the person has to have, and i mean has to, a VISA for india.
i didnt have a vise for india so i couldnt go. well i could of, i could of went all the way to bombai and had them tell me that i couldnt leave the airport. i could have risked my glifht to chicago in hopes that the consolit was open but...there was a thin chance of that cuz of it being sunday and all. but since i didnt get on a flight i can now refund my ticket, get the proper paper work, and go in a month or so. hopefully thge pastor checks his email before he takes his trek to the air port to pick me up.
i really have no one to blame but myself, i didnt make the proper calls, nor did i do all my home work on flight procedures. stupid me. i always rush into stuff without thinking. so thanks for the prayers but the trip is put off for another month or two....
much love, the dumbass | | |
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